Info Drop: Informed Consent

What is Informed Consent?

Consent isn’t just about saying “yes” or “no.” Informed consent means you understand exactly what you’re agreeing to, you’re free from pressure, and you have the space to make your choice clearly and confidently. Here’s the truth: if someone avoids answering your questions, dismisses your hesitation, or rushes past your boundaries, that’s not informed consent.

You never owe anyone access to your body just because you’ve kissed, flirted, or said yes in the past. Consent isn’t one-and-done, it’s ongoing, and it can be withdrawn at any time.

Trust your gut. Use code words with a friend. Make an exit plan if you need to. And know this: if it feels off, you don’t need to explain your way out of it, you can just leave. That’s your right.

~ Claire, writer for P.O.W.H.E.R

What Informed Consent Looks Like (in Real Life):

You’re hanging out with someone you like. Things are getting physical. You feel a little unsure — maybe the vibe changed, or maybe your body is reacting differently than your mind. You pause. You say, “I’m not sure I want to keep going.”

How that situation should go:

They stop immediately and check in with you

“That’s totally okay, do you want to talk, or should I give you some space?”

Remember:

You can always leave. You don’t owe anyone your body or your time. Trust your gut.

Feeling off is enough. You don’t need to explain or justify discomfort.

Be prepared:

Have a code word or exit plan. If you’re nervous, texting a friend a pre-arranged phrase like “Need to grab that charger” can cue them to call or help you leave.

No pressure, no guilt, no convincing:

Consent is being mentally present. You can change your mind anytime. If it’s not clear, enthusiastic, and informed, it’s not consent. Your body. Your boundaries. Your decision. Always.

What Does It Looks Like When Consent Isn't Respected?

Just because someone didn’t scream “no” doesn’t mean they said “yes.”

Situation:

You’re making out with someone. You freeze up when they start doing more than you’re comfortable with. You say “I don’t know if I want to do this.” And they don’t listen.

They say:

“C’mon, we’re already here.”

“You liked it earlier.”

“Just relax, it’ll be fine.”

What’s Wrong Here?

You expressed discomfort.

They ignored it.

They pressured you to keep going.

You felt like you couldn’t leave or say no.

Consent must be:

1. Freely given

2. Ongoing

3. Respected without pressure

4. Allowed to change at any time

Consent is a Conversation:

Consent isn’t a one-time checkmark. It’s an ongoing, respectful conversation where both people feel heard, safe, and supported. You can change your mind at any point — and that’s not confusing, dramatic, or “mixed signals.” It’s human.

Power Dynamics Matter:

If someone holds more power, emotionally, physically, or situationally, real consent might not be possible. Pressure can be quiet: guilt-tripping, threats to the relationship, or repeated pestering all chip away at your ability to say no freely.

"No" Doesn’t Need a Justification:

You don’t need a “good reason” to say no. “I’m not into it” or “I’m not sure” is more than enough. Consent isn’t something you have to earn by explaining yourself — it’s something you own by default.

Silence Is Not a Yes:

If someone isn’t actively saying yes, with enthusiasm and understanding, then it’s not consent. No response? Nervous laughter? Avoiding eye contact? These are signs to pause, not proceed.

Words to Use When You’re Unsure:

Sometimes we need help finding our voice.

“I want to slow down a bit.”

“Can we talk about this first?”

“I don’t feel ready right now.”

“I’m uncomfortable — let’s stop.”

You’re allowed to take up space and protect your comfort. Your boundaries deserve to be heard. If you froze or stayed silent, it’s not your fault. Silence is not consent.

Follow along on Instagram @powher.co for more real information, shared stories, and tools that support your power. 🩷

Have you ever been in a situation like this? How do you handle situations like this? You Matter! Your bodily autonomy matters! Your voice matters!

With love,

POWHER.co